I keep meaning to take a picture of the sign in the pet food store by my house advertising dog smoothies, but then I found them on the internets and here we are. WHAT THE HELL SMOOTHIES FOR DOGS? As my friend Crystal put it, “It’s not like dogs are known for their refined palates. Howard eats garbage and feces.” (She used a dirtier word than feces but I am feeling prissy.) Seriously, though, what the hell?
Mr. Barksmith’s Cool Treats ™ come in Fruit Delight and Peanut Butter flavors and they are dairy, wheat, and gluten free—because so many dogs are vegan and allergic to wheat. You don’t know how many times the dogs at my anarchist womyn’s reading group can’t eat the scones that a new person brought because they have wheat and dairy in them. Some people just don’t understand revolution.
And if you are so revolutionary that you want to DIY your dog smoothies, don’t worry because there are, of course, recipes. I can’t wait until there are toppings and stir-ins available, because I think most dogs would want some used cat litter or three-day-old sidewalk pizza in their smoothie to spice it up a little. Also how many dogs can even use a straw? Good grief.