Posts Tagged ‘bacon?’

Shut Up, Bacon #72299: That’s A Stretch

Wednesday, January 8th, 2014

New Rising Media reports “Study Shows Eating Bacon Will Make You Live Longer,” an incredibly misleading headline about a study in which scientists tested roundworms with doses of niacin. My favorite part of this report? “The vitamin [niacin] is also rich in the likes of Marmite, paprika, peanuts and sun-dried tomatoes.” Because, as we all know, Marmite is one of the leafy greens found in the wild known for its properties of longevity. (Do they know Marmite is a brand? Do they know it’s a spread created by humans?)

I mean, if you wanna eat bacon, just shut up and eat it already. It’s not going to make you live longer. If you love it, maybe you’ll enjoy your days more. If you write for SUF, however, you’ll die sooner because everyone keeps bro’ing out on it and it’s been driving you crazy for years.

Oh no.

Tuesday, May 3rd, 2011

There is a tumblr simply entitled, Monkeys Eating Bacon.  Oh. No.  Oh no no no.  Not the monkeys too!

Shut Up, Bacon: Filed under “wtf!??!?”

Saturday, December 4th, 2010

No. Words.

This Is A Cake That Looks Like A Ham – Ham cake – Jezebel

Saturday, April 3rd, 2010

Link: This Is A Cake That Looks Like A Ham – Ham cake – Jezebel

I cannot decide if this is an honorary “Shut Up Bacon” or not. Thoughts?

-Julia Childless