Brofessional.com, disappointingly, is not a site where Bros come to confess things. But it is “The One & Only Site Dedicated to Helping Bro’s Become Pro’s.” That does not involve learning how to use apostrophes. It does involve food, though!

They have exciting recipes like:

Holiday Dip

This pumpkin flavored treat started out as a Thanksgiving dessert, but it will spice up any holiday soiree. The best part is that there’s no baking, cooking, or work required.

Ingredients:

– 16 oz. Cool Whip (or any frozen whipped topping, thawed)
– 5 oz. instant vanilla pudding mix
– 15 oz. solid pack pumpkin
– 1 tsp. pumpkin pie spice (can substitute 1 tsp. ground nutmeg and cinnamon)

Mix pudding mix, pumpkin, and spice together. Stir in the thawed frozen whipped topping. Chill in the refrigerator before serving with cinnamon or honey graham crackers.

Let’s be honest. That’s not even funny. Brofessional is so deadly earnest that I can’t even really laugh at it. They have a whole advice column about whether “Bro’s Before Ho’s” really applies in every situation. Consider the potential pitfalls of mixing Bro’s with Ho’s for example:

Mix with caution. Many unfortunate brothers make the tragic bro-ho mistake. They try to mix their bros with their hoes, to disastrous results. Simply put, just because you like your bros and you like your hoes does not mean they will like each other. Chances are, your girl does not want to spend hours in someone’s basement chugging beer, watching ESPN, and talking about other babes. Likewise, there are very few situations in which bros would to partake in an afternoon excursion with your ho– can you really see them wanting to tag along shopping, getting a manicure, or catching a chick flick?

Otherwise, you may find yourself saying, “Oh No’s.”

—Snacktime