In a compelling story (OK, not really) about the chef Roger Mooking, the writer was able to extract the following quotes, but never found out why the hell Mooking changed his name from Moo in the first place. HOW COULD YOU NOT ASK THAT?

“Working in a kitchen is like working in construction – on crack. “It’s also like being an air fighter pilot: Your mind is firing, people are cussing at you, you’re sweating. And then you come back for more the next day. There’s a mania to it. There’s also a self-destructive mania to creating things that don’t last. That world is a comfort zone for me.”

“These fritters are da bomb!”

“I want a cat woman in a tight chef’s jacket and her boots would have fat, red break-dancer’s laces and chef’s knives coming out of them.”

“Even when I was just out of the crib, I’d leave the house in Trinidad, naked, find my way to the other side of the island, and come back home, fully clothed, with a new haircut, like, ‘What’s up, man? What’s for lunch?’ I was always on the move.”

“I drive a Hyundai!”

“I may be chopping onions under really expensive lights and through a really expensive lens, but I’m still chopping onions! You know what I mean?”