Coq au WHAT?

From Fancy Fast Food, this little gem: 

Cheerwine is a popular soft drink in the south that is more “cheer” than “wine” (and more “cherry” than “cheer”), but we’re going to pretend it’s that Pinot — it looks like that when you pour it into fancy stemware anyway.

What better way to pair a Carolina dish with Carolina Cheerwine than to fuse them together in a mock recipe for Coq Au Vin — that French dish where chicken is braised in red wine? And so, we present the Fancy Fast Food recipe for “Coq Au CheerVin” (pronounced kohk oh sheer vaehn’ if you want to sound all Frenchy):

My mind is sorta blown. You see, dear readers, I lived for a while in South Carolina, and I know people who drank Cheerwine. And it terrified me. And the idea of using it as a cooking ingredient—especially to make fast food taste better—well, I’m just. Yeah.

But strangely drawn to it. Like the day we had the Double Down in the office. Part of me wants it. The very, very bad part.