Raising the Sports Bar

The crowd goes wild for pan-seared ramps and garlic pastry puff concubine salad!

The NYT reports that sports bars are pulling out all the stops and providing highbrow, foodie-esque dining options:

The food is from-scratch, fresh and even locavore. Behold, then, the Springer Mountain free-range chicken from north Georgia proudly referenced on the menu of Dantanna’s Surf and Turf in the Buckhead neighborhood of Atlanta — along with Creekstone and Allen Brothers beef and Niman Ranch pork. Note the butternut squash bisque at the Hype Lounge, and that roasted brussels sprouts side at the Ainsworth, both in Manhattan. Then meditate on Emeril Lagasse’s steak BAM’Wich at his Lagasse’s Stadium in Las Vegas: grilled sirloin on herb focaccia dressed with blue-cheese slaw and balsamic-braised onions, served with truffle-Parmesan steak fries.

Most of this makes sense, yeah, ok – sports fans are foodies, etc. I love chicken wings and hot dogs and beer too. What I do *not* understand is the butternut squash bisque. I cannot possibly see how that sounds appealing to someone who is gearing up for a rowdy, athletic night. YEAH! WE’LL GET PITCHERS AND WINGS AND SOME FRIES! Then Lilith speaks up, “You mean frites.  And I’ll just have the butternut squash bisque. Is that locally-sourced butternut squash by the way?”

My favorite quote:

Alert customers certainly appreciate the effort.

Because those that are passed out in the back? Not so much.

Es-car-WHOA

Two snails, one is saying to the other "We'll have to slug it out"

Last night, one of us had snails. The other one had vegan soup and French fries.

YOU WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND US.

By the way, some perverted scientists gave snails speed.

The team trained the snails to remember to keep their pneumostomes closed when oxygen levels were low by poking them with a stick every time they tried to open their pneumostomes. Giving the snails two training sessions separated by an hour, the team knew that the molluscs would hold the memory for over 24·h, but what would happen if they trained the snails in meth-laced water?

That experiment doesn’t sound AT ALL like someone on meth dreamed it up.  Poking them in the pneumostomes!