Grub Street

Ro*veeta to be served in Williamsburg

Grub Street New York reports on the latest opening in Williamsburg – Mable’s Smokehouse:

“There wasn’t a place in our neighborhood to find the food we grew up eating,” says Love. That food — borracho beans, Rotel-Velveeta dip, Luzianne sweet tea, hot links imported from Schwab’s in Oklahoma City, pulled-pork tamales, and, of course, pie — makes its debut in a suitably honky-tonk setting that the couple built themselves.

As an avid fan of Rotel & Velveeta, mixed together, drizzled over tortilla chips – I find this… to be… stupid. Of course Velveeta & Rotel isn’t served in restaurants – you make it at home and cry into it while wearing your pajamas and watching Ryan Gosling movies like any other self-respecting creep.  Am I the only one irritated with this?  I grew up eating Schwann’s pizzas – are they gonna trick them out for Williamsburgers too?  What about celery with peanut butter in it?  Bologna & mustard sandwiches (with the mustard drawn on in a smiley face)?  No?   Too far?

There’s no price listed for it on their menu, but it better be less than making it yourself.  Also – you’re not fooling me with “housemade BBQ corn nuts.”  I buy mine at 7-Eleven like the other toothless no-goods.

PS.  Wonder Bread sucks

At last night’s Can-Do Awards Dinner (a fund-raiser for his pet charity, the New York Food Bank), someone paid $100,000 to have Batali, David Chang, and Chang’s old boss Tom Colicchio personally cook for a house party of twenty.

From Grub Street.  So you could anonymously give your money directly to the charity, probably feeding a ton of people, or you could just drop 100k for 20 of your most bougie, stuck up friends, under the guise of charity.  The choice is clear.